Feedback can hurt.

We claim to be open to feedback until we dislike an opinion. Then, we become defensive and resistant, making excuses for our behavior. It makes us feel vulnerable, especially when what we hear differs from what we believe to be true.

What we choose to do with the feedback is entirely up to us.

We can ignore it, get discouraged by it, or make it the catalyst for our development. You can take four action steps today to make feedback work for you.

1. Ask for it.

Ask a colleague to observe the next meeting you facilitate. Before the meeting, specifically, share what you want feedback on. Immediately after, you only need five minutes to receive and discuss their feedback.

2. Record yourself. The camera doesn't lie, especially if you want to see yourself through the eyes and ears of your listener.

3. Write it down. What we write, we invite in our life. Grab a Post-it note and write down one skill you wish to improve. Keep it on your desk or your calendar to remind yourself to focus on that skill in every conversation for the next week. Then, choose a new skill to focus on the following week.

4. Share with others. Accountability raises your chance for success by 65%! Tell others about your journey to improve your influence, share your observations, the plan you created and why it is important to you.

We can allow feedback to either hurt or see it as the gift that it is. Choose to improve your skills with ongoing feedback to communicate with influence, Monday to Monday.