It's time for leaders to stop talking and start acting the way they want their employees to behave.
People pay close attention to what leaders do versus what they say. This is especially true when there is perceived hypocrisy in play. Employees notice what behaviors are rewarded, recognized and even acceptable. When leaders talk about what is important to them, then act differently, their team notices.
Meet Tracey
“Why do people look at their phones when I’m talking?”
This is what Tracey, one of my clients said to me after a meeting left her feeling only half-heartedly heard.
She went on to say “One person even left the room to take a call halfway through the meeting and two others quietly chatted amongst each other on the side. Why can’t I keep their attention?”
That’s when I asked, do you look at your phone during meetings? Have you ever carried on a side bar conversation or gotten up to leave a room?
She grinned and said, “yes I have!”
It is like when a parent says to their kid, “Do as I say, not as I do.” Yeah, right. Like that was going to happen.
Stop Talking. Start Acting.
When your actions speak louder than your words, your listeners start guessing which one is telling the truth. Learning to earn and keep people’s attention when you speak is key. In fact, only 17% participants we surveyed said they felt confident in their ability to engage meeting multitaskers prior to attending our training. After attending our training, over 74% felt confident they had the skills to prevent multi-taskers.
If others fail to pay attention when you speak, there’s likely a simple reason why.
First, seek the truth. It’s easy to assume how others perceive us. Rarely are we right. Ask someone you trust to share how you are seen and heard by others.
Next, create a plan. Ask a peer or mentor to hold you accountable to correct your problem behavior that you’re willing to change.
Lastly, practice until permanent. Every interaction is an opportunity to practice! Deliberately practice the behaviors you want to change until they become second nature.
People believe what you tell them AND what you show them. Apply these three steps and you can start demonstrating the consistent behaviors you want others to see and to influence action
